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Each time I looked at myself wearing it, I found just one more thing thatlet me accept the fact that I really did look good in it, and I began tofeel that competing might just be a way for all of us to accept the deathof my sister.When I told mom that I would do it, she became like a general. Shecarefully took my measurements, then we went shopping for gowns of my own,since I refused to wear my sisters. Then I began a rigorous schedule oflearning how to walk, use my hands, speak and so on. Five hours every day,plus my piano practice. Learning how to stand tall, walk with a smile,point my boobs out, and not look or sound like a total air head like somany of those other girls do. Mom and I worked hard, and as the day drewnear I seemed to calm down, and accept what I had to do. I had selected mymusic, had the gowns fitted, bought the right undergarments, took a lot ofbubble baths and used what seemed like gallons of lotion to make my skinsoft and supple, until I knew that I was ready.On. " No Fred, let me do it. I'll give her a shoulder to cry on and try to ease her mind about having to face you." Ann, if the story you told me is true she doesn't have to worry about me." You and I know that Fred, she doesn't."Bess spent three days crying and begging me for forgiveness and I must have told her fifty times that I did. Eventually she accepted my assertions that I forgave her and that I wanted to forget that it ever happened. I couldn't of course, there was no way I could ever forget that my wife had been gangbanged, but I had to try and convince her that I had. I was affectionate and loving and I tried to show that nothing had changed between us, but things had.Before Bess had her 'lost night' we had enjoyed a rather robust sex life - five and sometimes six nights a week. Suddenly we were down to one or maybe two and only then if I refused to take no for an answer. I told myself it was natural for her to want to avoid sex for a while after what had happened to her and I.
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